Sometimes, I take a deep breath and hold it in for a moment.

just lean back, close my eyes and while I think

listen to the room, to the house, to the world outside

server slowly churning away, waiting for the mean time failure

in the other room, the dog, breathing, licking, whining, sleeping

the weight of the house on top of me, its age, its grace

no cars outside, and maybe…

Then, the AC kicks in, the light flicker and I let my breath out. That moment was gone.